April 28, 2008

here safe and sound in california. will post all the details this week…

somewhat concerned about punctuation and grammar but not enough to really do anything about it.



April 27, 2008

three days down one to go and i don’t give a hoot about punctuation


April 26, 2008

I like that word, “moosh”.  It describes my brain to a T.  “T” is also for thankful, which is what I am.  We are now half-way to California.

I got some amazing pictures of the windmills along our route today, but the whole “moosh” factor…I’m just too tired to post them.

Tomorrow we’ll go to to Mass (a zillion parishes here; it shouldn’t be a problem), cross another border and enjoy the shorter day of driving.

I hope that you’re all well; it’s so far, so good here.

How Do You Go Without Leaving?

April 25, 2008

That’s what I want to know. I want to go to our next duty station because I love a good adventure; but at the same time, I don’t want to leave our wonderful life that we’ve lived in Texas.

Our life is so different now! Let me count the ways:

– Fireball is four years old; I was pregnant with him when we moved to Texas;

– When we moved to Texas five years ago, I was mom to five, and leave as mom of seven (!);

– We’ll be starting our third year of homeschooling this summer (wow!);

– We love our Catholic faith (we were a little…casual…in years past);

– I’m almost the mother of a TEENAGER! Wow, what fun! I love teenagers!!!

– I never would have imagined that I would have a wonderful, deeply fulfilling and very successful business (all praise and thanks to Holy God, as Father Richard would say), but I do!;

– We’re leaving here, having done two full (very full!) deployments in the space of four years–not counting time gone for training;

– My cup overfloweth with the most amazing circle of good and Godly friends any girl could ever hope to have. (sigh)

The act of picking up your life and moving it creates an inescapable vacuum from which there is no escape. In other words, it sucks.

Sorry for the low-brow; I’m so tired, I can’t really find another word to describe it. “It’s hard” doesn’t quite articulate the sorrow (not that “moving s*cks” could ever be mistaken for articulate). But at the same time, I know that only good things are ahead. I absolutely believe the Lord when He said through Jeremiah that His plans are only to prosper us.

Gotta stop defining God’s ways by what we think prosperity is. I believe that the prosperity in the Mind of God has nothing to do with a balance sheet or worldly opinions; I think it’s all about the ultimate prosperity: Heaven. And if I have to go live in the desert for four years to get closer to that, well, you know, So Be It.

I will go, joyfully.

7 Facts About Me

April 23, 2008

A Meme! (When I Should be A Cleaning!)

Lynn at Signs and Wonders tagged me for this one. It’s all your fault, Lynn! ; )

1. I should be cleaning right now, as we are clearing our house in the morning and there is still a TON to do! But this is way more fun, so I’m sneaking it in real quick. O: )

2. Once upon a time, I had my student pilot’s license to fly a hot air balloon. Now those were some great times!

3. My greatest personal challenge in life is to be heard. I’ve always struggled with that.

4. I’ve been the luckiest girl in the world for 16 years this Friday. Happy Anniversary, my Love!

5. I can type just about as fast as speaking speed. But nt witout typoes.

6. My favorite color is purple, especially the periwinklish/lavenderish shades. : ) : ) : )

7. We have a fabulous Newfoundland, Tess, who is technically a living organism, but more closely resembles a speed bump with a pulse. I promise I will blog her one of these days.

I tag Sue at Become What You Are!

Miscarriage & Personhood

April 19, 2008

Well, my friends, we’ve fallen off the nest.

I don’t quite know how to articulate the pain of losing a child that I’ve never met, someone who I only know through two pink lines, bone-weary exhaustion and hope. But what I do know about this soul is that he will live forever in the Kingdom of God, eternally. Hub & I desire baptism for all of our miscarried children, and just as Christ taught that the faith of the friends saved the paralytic, we are hopeful that our faith and desire for them has baptized them into the Family of God.

I have no doubt that life begins at conception: no life, no cell division–that much we know. We believe that our children are persons from the very first cellular moment (and no, I don’t mean “Can you hear me now?”). They are small, and hidden, but they are uniquely alive. My friend, Sue, has that wonderful Dr. Seuss quote on her blog, “A person’s a person no matter how small”. I know many women who can tell you that there is a definite personality on the inside that is plain as day once they are born; I experienced this with all three of my full-term babies, who have only grown in the personalities that they shared on the inside.

There is speculation that I have low progesterone, which can make it darn near impossible to maintain a pregnancy. This little one caught us completely by surprise; after losing Pio in February, we wanted to give my body a break and find out what exactly is going on with me via the Pope Paul VI Institute in Omaha. And then there was Thomas…and then there wasn’t. So now we are really wondering what in the world is going on and are very anxious to get to our new duty station to get the ball rolling on figuring this out.

But for now, I am numb. The emotional highs of this wonderful little surprise that wasn’t even on our radar to begin with, then the lows of losing him, all in the midst of packers and movers. Misery with an audience; not so much my cup of tea, but so be it.

I should say, too, that we don’t care one iota about having a certain number of children, and we’re not in a race to have as many as we can before we can’t anymore. It’s not about what we can do, but about what God can do through us, whether that is many more children or not even one more, it’s about saying yes to His will for us, whatever that may be.

To our family and friends, thank you for all of your love and prayers, whether it be joy or sorrow. To know of your love and prayers is more than enough, making us unbelievably blessed. Thank you, thank you.

For our children who we’ll never meet in this life, we are lovably bound together, safe in the arms of the Body of Christ. The veil may be opaque, but it is very thin, and I know that they are there and I love them all very dearly: Rose, Mary, Pio & Thomas. Pray for us, dear children, that we can see you all someday, and that I will hold your sweet faces in my hands and kiss your cheek one by one, bathed in the glory and love of the Beatific Vision.

Goofing Off

April 17, 2008

What do you do for fun when your life is all packed up in boxes?

Ready? Set?


Sometimes, baby, you just gotta fly!

And don’t forget to show off your genetic ability to roll your tongue…

Nevermind being totally goofy… 🙂

And this one is for Nana C, who doesn’t believe that Firstie and Middlin are really that big!